Guilt pt. 2

I talked to my brother about the whole feeling guilty thing. He was really cool about it. He said "Well, the next time we visit we will just have to have a pool birthday party for her." When I mentioned that we didn't want her to look back and see that we weren't there and think it was because we loved Syd more (or whatever) he jokingly said he would PhotoShop us into some pictures. He gets it.

My brother and I both have money issues. Not issues like we don't have any... issues like it is a hugely emotional part of our lives. We weren't raised to understand or appreciate money. The only thing we were taught is that you wait until the shut off notice comes and then call. They will give you more time.

Now, before anyone things I am bashing my parents, let me explain. My dad was sick. Very sick. In the late 70's he had major, groundbreaking surgery. They told my mom that if he was lucky enough to survive the surgery (only about 20% chance, they said) he would be lucky to live 5 years.

My dad loved to travel. My mom wanted to make sure that he got to as much as he could before he died. We traveled a lot. Weekend trips here, week long trips there, even day trips over there.

I don't know what I would have done if I were in my moms position, but I do know that no matter what decision she made it would have left my brother and with some pretty warped views on money.

My sister in law is the reason my brother doesn't have the warped views any more. Me busting my ass to make sure I change things is the reason I don't. (Although I am sure some people will look at how cheap, controlling and micro-managing we are with money and say we still have warped views... just warped differently.)

So he gets it. I still feel bad, but at least I know the bills are paid, the "sinking funds" are funded and my niece is so young hopefully she won't remember.